Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?
2003-01-15@9:43 p.m.
sup you guys?
well, my week's been up and down so far. it's only wednesday, but i can tell it's not gettin any better. i dunno. monday night and tuesday afternoon were good, but everything else has been kinda mediocre. i dunno, i've been up an down and left and right and back and forth and on and on.....i'm so sick of it!
i feel like i've been tossed in a washing machnine and thrown on high then put in the dryer on extra spin dry. it feels REALLY bad. i dunno what's wrong with me. it feels.....weird.
this whole thing with mary. i don't think it's what's botherin me, but i don't know where we're at. what are we? don't ask me cuz i don't know. yeah, it's fun bein here sometimes, but sometimes it's horrible. it's like we're just hook-up buddies, and inadvertantly that's what we agreed to be. but that's not all i want. i mean, we see each other for like 1 to 2 hours at the most at a time and how much of that time is spent talking? i'm not gonna say but by my mood and what i've said, you should guess it's not much. i want more, but not too much more. i don't wanna go a whole weekend only seein each other for two hours. but, once again that is inadvertantly what agreed on.
okay, so maybe that is what was botherin me. i'm tellin you. i start these kinds of entries off not knowing what's wrong with me but by the end i know what's wrong. and sometimes (such as now) it turns out to be what i least expected. but, to quote a friend who was recently become a fairly good source of advice, "ya know, what can ya do?"
l8er.
- tripp
----------------------------------------
crazy town - "drowning"
sugarcult - "pretty girl"
kottonmouth kings - "suburban life"
sum 41 - "motivation"
sum41 - "fat lip"
blink 182 - "dammit"
incubus - "pardon me (acoutsic)"
letters to cleo - "i want you to want me"
and the one that sums me up the most today pertaining to my "problem"....
THE CLASH - "SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO NOW?"
here we go one last time round this same old ferris wheel.
knowing that at the end, at the bottom, pain will be all i can feel.
so why buy the ticket and stand in the line?
when i can see when it's over you will never be mine.
chasin after you through this theme park called life.
around every corner there's "just one more ride."
but i'm gettin pretty tired of the same old "thrills."
will we ever realize it's time to move on? we're no longer kids.